USS Penumbra Sim Narrative, SD 202105.28
Holiday Sim: . The following is a Memorial Day Holiday Barbecue held on the Penumbra in the ship's large lounge at Eight Forward. While it fits into the main story and timeline, it stands apart as the crew takes some off-duty time to relax and enjoy the holiday. . A few members of the crew were not present at this sim, having Real Life vacations or family gatherings or other matters to attend to. . The crew and Hosting Staff of the USS Penumbra extend their sincere gratitude to all the Fallen Heroes of all allegiances and militaries as well as those First Responders and others who gave the Ultimate Sacrifice so that we can enjoy the Freedoms we hold so dear! . The Penumbra was also pleased to host a visit from Vice Admiral Sulyk of the Executive Board of the United Space Federation (a high-ranking member of Starfleet Command) who joined us for these festivities. . (A portion of this Narrative was taken from the "#8-forward" channel of the Penumbra's Discord server, our "general chat" and "hang out" room, but was pasted onto the log from our usual channel of "#final-frontier" to make a more complete picture of the festivities.)

Eight Forward: . Commodore Zachary Taylor, the Human in command of the Penumbra, strode into Eight Forward, the Penumbra's general lounge in the forward portion of Deck 8. He'd left Colonel Travis Patterson, the Human Marine who was the Executive Officer, in command on the Bridge while he took some time to carouse with the crew. . As Zak entered he called out, "Evening, folks!" . Lieutenant Commander Tabeshk Tiwan Tibris, the half-Klingon, half-Romulan albino who was the Chief of Operations, was tending a grill that had been set up to one side of the lounge. He waved with a spatula, "Wassup, Captain!" . Near Tabby was Lieutenant Junior Grade Jackson Carshel, a Human in the Sciences Division, who gave a nod and said, "Evening, sir." . At the other end of the lounge, still somewhat uncomfortable socializing with the crew, was the civilian operator of the freighter, Canteen of Sparkles, Misty Melody Mane. She waved, "Hello!" . The Commodore was followed a moment later by Commander Relok, the Vulcan Chief of Sciences and Second Officer of the ship. Relok said, "Greetings and salutations one and all." . Misty quipped, "Oh don't sound so dull, Mr. Boss Man. Today's a party, after all, right?" . A few more moments passed and Corporal Homer Kyle entered. He was a Human in the Marines that hailed from the Great Smoky Mountains of western North Carolina. He drawled, "How y'all is?" and waved with a toothy grin. He was pulling guard duty and took up a station near the entry door with his WAR rifle handy. . Another few moments and the elderly Vulcan from Starfleet Command, Vice Admiral Sulyk, stumbled through the door, looking momentarily confused. "Oh! Am I here? Is this the Penumbra?" Of course, the Commodore and the Colonel knew by now that the Admiral's appearance of bumbling age and ineptitude were a façade he put on deliberately to divert attention from himself. In fact, he had many, many years as a Starfleet Intelligence Operative.
. Carshel assured Sulyk, "Yes, sir, Vice Admiral." . Misty glanced around and mumbled, "I just hope Al doesn't show up. That guy has been looking at me weird, like I'm some goddess or something. Just weird." ==/\== . Sure enough, just as Misty voiced her concern, Ensign Alonso "Al" Thums arrived. He was a Human in the Engineering Department that hailed from south-central Louisiana. He, himself, claimed he (and in some renditions, his whole family) was under some kind of "voodoo curse". It might just be, since he came hobbling in on crutches after his latest rounds of accidents. He started speaking, "Hi ...," but one of the crutches snagged on the door and he tripped, falling into the Admiral. "Ah!" he called out. . "Nope!" Misty cried out and collected her food and exited Eight Forward to hide out on her own little ship in the Hangar Bay. . As Al fell into the Admiral, the older man reached out to grab the edge of a table to arrest his fall. He groaned, "Oh, my!" . Zak, standing near the Admiral when Al fell into him, at first reached out a hand to grab the elderly Vulcan's arm, then remembered Vulcans did not like to be touched and so snatched his hand back. . Carshel just stood watching the potential disaster unfold since he was on the far side of the intervening table. . Al righted himself. "Sorry!" he cried, "I'm still getting used to these things." To illustrate what he was referring to, he waved a crutch around, nearly clocking Relok upside the head! "Whoa!" Al exclaimed. "Oh, hi, Commander!" . Tabby rolled his eyes. "Al ... can you ... not?" . Relok raised an eyebrow at the unlucky Engineering Ensign. "Perhaps you should seat yourself sooner rather than later, Ensign." He moved to the bar and ordered a tall glass of red wine.
. Tabby agreed. "Just sit down, Al ... just sit down." He rubbed his ridged forehead. "Sit down and stay put. Food will be served to you, Al." . Al flopped into a chair that wobbled scarily for a moment but didn't fall over. "Dang!" Al said, "Looks like I got one with a crooked leg!" . Tabby groaned. "If it breaks, Al, just ... sit on the floor then. We don't have time to fix it right now." . Sulyk stood there a moment, then turned to Zak. "Commodore ... is there a VIP section? Far away from Ensigns wielding huge bludgeoning weapons?" He gestured towards Al. . "Uh," Zak stammered a moment. "Sure, Admiral ... over here should be safe ... um, that is, comfortable." . Carshel stepped forward. "I will escort you, Admiral. Follow me." He gestured for the Admiral to come with him to the other side of Eight Forward. ==/\== . Tabby got Al settled and slowly ... and carefully ... took the crutches away from Al before checking on the chair leg to make sure it would hold. . "Thanks, Mr. Tabby, uh, sir ... I mean, um, Commander," Al said. . "Tabeshk is fine enough," the half-Klingon grumbled. "If that's too hard, then just 'Tabby'." He went back over to the grill where he had beef and pork all laid out. . As the Admiral followed Carshel, he studied the young Lieutenant carefully. As he stopped at his table he turned and asked, "Do I know you, son? You seem familiar." . "It's a bit of a story, sir," Carshel said as he held out the Admiral's chair for him. "I could explain but ... not here." He excused himself and went over to the bar to collect a glass of whiskey, straight. As he sipped, he thought about his mother, Jackal, in hiding somewhere, and hoped she was okay. This was the long story he'd implied but didn't tell. It was also the connection the Admiral remembered but they didn't discuss.
. Meanwhile, Zak collected a Bourbon and Seven from the bar along with a Margarita for the Admiral and brought them over to the "VIP Section". The Admiral accepted the drink with a nod. "I see you've done some research on my tastes, Commodore." . Zak just smiled and sat down next to the Admiral and took a swig of his cocktail. "Mmm ... that's good. I needed that." . Across the room, Al waved an arm and called, "Mr. Tabby? Mr. Tabby, sir? Could you bring me a drink? I hate to be a pest, but ... you took my crutches ...," he trailed off. . "Yeah, yeah," Tabby groaned again, "what would you like, Al?" . Al grinned, "I'd like me a big ol' Bloody Mary, with plenty of Tabasco sauce and lots of olives!" . Staff Sergeant Will Davies, a Human Marine in the Pathfinders group, entered just in time to hear Al's order. He quipped, "That's all? Just Tabasco?" . Al turned and stared at Davies like he was stupid or something. "Well, no, it's gotta have vodka and tomato juice too, of course. Duh." ==/\== . Tabby shrugged at Al, "All right, but just one, otherwise I will strap you to the wall to stay put!" He prepared the man his drink and brought it over to him. As he handed over the glass he said, "Just drink the dang drink, Al. If that food burns," he gestured at the grill, "it's gonna be your fault, you know?" . Davies grinned. "Get you some ghost pepper juice in it. Put some hair on your chest." . Tabby smirked, "Ha! Won't help me much at all! All my hair is snow white, won't see it anyway." He didn't say it, but his skin was pretty much snow white as well. . Davies rolled his eyes, "It's metaphorical." . Tabby retorted, "I know, Davies, I know! Still ...," he grabbed a pepper from the condiments tray and grinned, "Gonna eat me a pepper, though." . Al grinned at both Davies and Tabby and said, "But ... Tabasco is from Avery Island, right up the bayou from home! I don't wanna get burned, I wanna get lit!"
. Relok, standing at the bar with his wine, groaned, "I can only imagine what happens when Mr. Thums becomes inebriated." . Tabby's face went stern. "Never use those words again!" Then he smiled, "You getting 'lit' ... I can't take you seriously, Al!" He handed Al a second Bloody Mary ... but this one was only half full. . At the door, standing guard, Kyle muttered, "Why's I gotta be guard when arybody else gets to have fun?" . Tabby smirked at him. "'Cause it's you, Kyle." . Davies felt sorry for the poor Corporal and walked over to him. "Go enjoy things, Corporal. I've got this. Have fun." . Kyle grinned his wide grin and said, "Wayull, Sergeant, since you outranks me, I guess I done been relieved! Thanks, Sergeant." . Davies smiled back, "You're welcome, Corporal." He gave a head wave to tell the younger man to go on. . Tabby started putting food on various plates, steak, pork loin, burgers, and hot dogs. "Ay!" he called out, "Come get your damn food! It's steak and pork loins and stuff!" ==/\== . Zak looked over at Sulyk and started, "So, Admiral, about the Breen ...." . But the Admiral cut him off. "Tut, tut, Commodore ... no business with pleasure!" He lifted his margarita and took another sip. . Zak blushed. "Of course, Admiral, I ...," he lifted his own drink and took another sip, to shut himself up. . Tabby brought a plate over to Al. "Here, eat up. You'll need the protein." . Al nodded at him and dug into the pork loin with the plastic knife and fork Tabby had given him. Apparently, Tabby was afraid the unlucky man would cut himself with a sharp knife. Tabby turned and grabbed another plate and bellowed, "KYLE! Get your butt over here and eat some dang food, damnit!"
. About that time, Lieutenant Commander Denovan Hawke, the Human ex-Borg who was their Chief of Security and Tactical Operations, sauntered into the lounge. He glanced around, taking note of the placement of people, tables, chairs, the hot grill, and everything else his cybernetically-enhanced Borg implants relayed to his tactical mind. He muttered, "Oh lord ... everyone is getting drunk." . Al bore down on his food with his plastic fork only to have it break on him. "Aw, come on!" he exclaimed. . Tabby brought him another plastic fork and used it to gesture at the steak. "The steak is pre-cut, you know. Cut here or here," he showed the markings, "and you'll get a bite." He noticed the Tactical Officer and called out, "DEEEENNNN!!! C'mere! I has food for you ... and no, I have not been drinking. You don't want me drinking." . Zak called over, "Den! Come sit by me and Admiral Sulyk ... it's the VIP section for us Senior Officers. Tabby's busy tending the pit, so ...," he trailed off. . Tabby snapped back, "Oh, shut up, Captain. I could talk and cook at the same time." He flipped more meat from the grill onto platters and announced, "Alright, we got burgers and hot dogs coming out now ORDERRRRRRR UP!" ==/\== . Sulyk eyed his almost empty glass and glanced up at Zak and said, "We may be requiring refills soon, Commodore." . Tabby overheard and responded, "I got it, sirs! Refills coming up!" Without noticing, Tabby had left his meat fork lying on the grill, a bit too close to the flames. . Den stood there a moment, glancing between Tabby and Zak. "Hmm ...," he mused then collected two hot dogs, putting mayonnaise on them. ~Yes,~ he thought to himself, ~Mayo.~ Then he brought his plat over to Zak and Sulyk and greeted them, "Sir, Admiral." . Tabby brought the refills and Den turned to him, " Thank you, Tabby, by the way!" . "You're welcome," the half-Klingon replied.
. Kyle collected his plate of food and sat down opposite Al. "Sorry y'all gots all banged up, sir," he said. "Y'all gots to be more careful!" . Al was grumbling at his steak. "Pre-cut meat like I'm some kind of child." He took one of the pieces and put it in his mouth, chewing sullenly. . Tabby heard Al's grumbling and snapped back at him, "Al, you're lucky I gave you standard, hard plastic utensils! I could have given you the decorated little kiddie ones." . Al tried to stick out his tongue at Tabby, but instead a chunk of chewed pork flopped out into Kyle's plate. . "Ew!" Tabby screwed up his nose. . Kyle flicked the offending piece of food away from his own food. "Ewww! Sir, keep y'all's food on y'all's own plate ... sir!" . Tabby handed Kyle a napkin. "It won't kill you, just clean it up." . Al stammered, "Sorry, it ... slipped. I ... uh ...." . "Al," Tabby sighed, "shut up and eat. It wouldn't have 'slipped' if you hadn't tried to insult me with that childish tongue-sticking-out routine." He grumbled under his breath, "Maybe I should have given him the kiddie utensils." ==/\== . Tabby returned to the grill and grabbed his cooking fork only to discover it was quite hot. "Aww! Crap!" he exclaimed, dropping the hot fork to the floor. He spun and barked out, "Al, I blame you for distracting me!" With a pot holder he picked up the now dirty fork and put it with the other dirty plates. He glanced at his hand and confirmed he wasn't injured, just shocked at the hot fork. Still, he mumbled, "Owie!" . Den still stood in front of the Admiral and the Commodore. He turned and gave Tabby a smirk. "You know, that's why they make oven mitts ... or gloves." . Tabby grumbled, "Real men don't use mitts." . Den shrugged. "They do when they know better and don't want to be burnt, Tabby."
. Tabby just grabbed a new fork, this one with a rubber handle with a delicate floral design. At Den's raised eyebrow he said, "Don't ask. It's Bevin's." He collected the rest of his tools and moved them a little further from the pit, just to be sure. . Den turned back to the senior officers and said, "Before I start eating, can I get either of you two something?" . Sulyk smiled when Tabby had given him his refill. He picked it up and licked gingerly at the salt around the rim and then said, "This must be one of you Humans' greatest accomplishments ... simple Sodium Chloride put to such use." . Zak smiled at the Vulcan as he took a sip of his own refill before saying, "You do know we didn't invent that, right? It occurs naturally." . Den took a bite of food and chewed a moment, then gestured with his fork. "Margarita, Admiral?" . Sulyk smiled back at Zak and said, "I know, Zak. But to have ground it down and decided to eat it. The first Human to discover he could crush this crystal and use it to season his food was a true genius." . Zak gave the Vulcan a little nod. "Interesting observation, Admiral." He took a sip and then sat his glass down. "You know ... you don't strike me as a 'normal' Vulcan, sir." . Sulyk raised an eyebrow and answered, "I've been on Earth for pretty much your entire life, Zak. I think your bad habits are rubbing off." ==/\== . About that time Tabby, working at the pit, began to sing a Vulcan folk song about fire. Sulyk turned his head. "Wait ... is the albino Klingon singing ... an ancient Vulcan song?" . Den gave a slight shrug. "He always does weird things like that. And the salt," he returned their conversation to the previous topic, "was figured out as an agent to cure meat and keep it from spoiling, before we discovered refrigeration."
. At the end of the bar, Carshel had finished his fourth glass of whiskey and his third plate of food. He stood shakily and announced with a slight slur, "I ... think I will ... be heading to ... my quarters for ... some rest. I had ... a bit ... too much. Hic!" . At the other end of the bar, Relok lifted his second, or maybe third, glass of wine and joined in singing the Vulcan fire song! . Al waved at Carshel with a huge grin on his face. "When ya drinks 'em fast they hits ya hard!" Carshel recruited one of the other guards to see him safely back to his quarters. . Sulyk saluted Den with his half-empty glass. " Then here's to ancient Human cavemen deciding to rub salt on their raw meat." . Den didn't currently have a drink to return the toast, so he just tipped his empty hand in the return gesture. Zak lifted his nearly empty glass as well with a smile. . After a few minutes of Tabby and Relok doing their duet, Tabby changed over to an ancient Vulcan song about water, one his mother had sung to him to help him sleep. He started trying his hand at preparing some meats using Vulcan seasonings (such that they were). . Relok sidled over to Tabby, a slight wobble evident in his movements as the wine was beginning to get to him. He said, "You do know, Tabby, that many Vulcans don't actually eat meat. I know, I know, totally illogical since we have canine teeth for tearing flesh." . "I know, Relok. I wanted the Admiral to try some. He might like it!" He carried Den a glass of whiskey since he felt bad that he didn't have a drink. . Den accepted it graciously, thinking to himself, ~Sure, why not?~ He splashed the drink back in one gulp. ==/\== . When Tabby had returned to the grill he gave Relok a careful look and said, "I think you've had a bit much and should start going light. You're wobbling, Relok."
. Relok ignored him, mumbling a few of the words to Tabby's water song. Suddenly, he stopped and said, "Sometimes I miss the Cloud Forests of the mountains of my home." . Tabby collected the Vulcan-seasoned meat and brought it over to the VIP table. "It's on the house, guys. Try it, see if you like it. It's something new I've been working on." . About that time, Al had decided he was ready for a refill. Since Tabby was at the VIP table, he figured he'd just help himself. He stood up, forgetting his injured ankle until he put weight on it. It gave, and he stumbled and fell, crashing into the barbecue pit! . Tabby whirled at the noise. "WHAT THE HELL, AL!" Quickly he grabbed at the pit to stand it back up before it dumped fire and hot coals on the carpet. But ... he couldn't catch the meat which fell out onto the floor, nor all of the coals. . Al was hopping on one foot, holding his now truly burned hand. "Ow! Ow! Ow!" . Tabby grabbed the first thing that popped into his head: mayo, and slathered a generous portion all over Al's burned hand and then shoved the man down to sit on the floor. . Zak and Den both jumped up from their seats. Zak called out, "Damn! Al! Tabby, get a fire extinguisher!" . Relok just stood there, staring at hot coals falling onto the carpet. "That's not good," he muttered. . Tabby quickly ran to get a fire extinguisher and was back in seconds, spraying the smoldering coals. . Sulyk sat calmly at his table. He said, "Interesting crew you have here, Zak." He seemed more amused that alarmed. . Tabby whirled on Al again. "Thanks, Al! You ruined the meat, and ruined the grill, and damn near burned a hole through the ship's floor! Nice job! You could have just asked." ==/\== . Al sat on the floor, his hands now slathered in thick, creamy mayonnaise. "Uh ...," he said, "are you ... supposed to do that?" He raised the gooey hands with a questioning look on his face.
. "Yes you are," Tabby answered, "It stops the burns. Air causes the burning. Mom taught me that." . Den stood there a moment and then said, "Perhaps they need to sit down and I should take that over." . Tabby shrugged at him, "It's fine, Commander, don't worry about it." But he let out an exasperated sigh. "Thankfully, we have a stove here. I guess we are going to stir-fry." . Zak also sighed and then glanced at the Admiral. "Admiral, would you care to adjourn to my quarters for another nightcap?" . Sulyk stood then and turned to Zak. "No, thank you, Commodore. I have quarters on the Station for now. I'll be speaking with you and the Colonel soon, I gather. Good night, Commodore." . Den gave Sulyk a respectful nod, "Good night, Admiral." . Tabby glared at Al. "Give it five minutes ... and don't touch anything, Al! The mayo needs to sit. It's like ... lotion. Please, Al?" . Relok had watched as Tabby put out the fire, and then started a separate stove. "Well," he began, "I'm guessing that my slowed reactions may very well mean I've had enough for tonight. I'll be off, then." . Tabby nodded at Relok, "Night, Relok." Then he looked at the remnants of his cook-out. "I'm gonna have to spend all week fixing all of this." . Zak glanced around the nearly destroyed lounge, then turned to the Engineering Officer sitting on the floor. "Al ... since you're on Medical Leave you don't have to clean up your own mess, but .... you can hang around and watch your coworkers fix the damage." . Al looked up at him. "But ... I .... Yes, Commodore." . Zak turned his attention back to their chef for the night. "Tabby ... prepare a few servings for those unable to attend tonight and set it aside. I'm headed to my quarters for the night as well." . "Aye, sir."
. Davies watched the last of them leave and then walked over to help Tabby with the clean up while Al watched them from the floor.